And it all goes down -- I think I lost (update)

11:43 a.m.
To: Phx
From: UB

Are you mad at me?

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11:49 a.m.
To: UB
From: Phx

It's just really gotten to me how you talk to and about people sometimes.

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11:51 a.m.
To: Phx
From: UB

What are you talking about? What did I do?

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11:55 a.m.
To: UB
From: Phx

Mainly the sarcasm, and how if people make mistakes, they are called idiots or morons… it might be joking or whatever, but it's still a put down. And even with people in this office—yes, it's easy to complain about people in this office when we work with them every day. And when I said to Rose that she must have a "nice filing system" in her head—I was complimenting her. That was all. Yet when I leave, you say "what ever", and I don't see the point in saying something like that. I guess I just talk to people differently than you do—they are probably fine with it, but it just started to get to me.

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12:20 p.m.
To: Phx
From: UB

So instead of talking to me about what is bothering you, you just ignore me? I thought we were supposed to be friends and if you have a problem with something I have done then tell me and we can work it out, talking is always better than not talking. I might not like what you have to say but I will always listen and value your opinion and your feelings.

I am not the only one in this office that calls people idiots or morons and I do not generally talk that way about people in this office. And a lot of it stems from me hearing Q call people idiots or morons, look at the way she talks about the computer people. Not that I am trying to make excuses, I know I do talk about people that way sometimes, I also call myself and idiot and a moron when I make mistakes, it makes the day go easier.

The "whatever" was because it seems that lately Q does not remember things that she tells me to do or discussions we have, and that is part of our relationship, it was meant as a joke between me and her and had nothing to do with your comment at all. If you haven't noticed her and I tease each other a lot and we seem to be getting along ok we have been doing it for a couple of years now.

If I have done something personally to you to offend or upset you then I apologize, I have never called you a moron or idiot and I do not think of you that way at all, I do not think of any one here that way at all and if I seem to have portrayed that sentiment than I am sorry for that too. I know I can say things about the receptionist and Q sometimes but that is mostly out of concern for Irene and frustration about what Q was doing.

I know that I can be sarcastic, I have always been that way and I am sorry if my sarcasm upsets you but I really cannot change who I am. I have been feeling a little crappy about all the work and stuff lately and that has probably caused me to be more sarcastic than usual, but it seems that things are starting to lighten up a little and I am starting to get ahead.

So is that all you see me do is call people idiots and talk sarcastically about them? Wow I am horrible ;)! I am glad that you told me that this was bothering you; I shall try to tone it down in the future, I do not want to upset or offend anyone.

Thank you.

Is it safe for me to ask if you brought a lunch today?? :)
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I haven't replied yet... I don't want to go on and on to her about all the things I can't stand. Really, is there a point? She says we are friends. I honestly don't consider her a friend. A friend is someone who I can trust, someone who I can confide in. I would never confide in her. I never tell her anything about my personal life, yet she unindates me with hers.

I started out great, but now I'm at a loss. I know if I eat with her I'm going to have to hear about her new pet and that guy and I really don't care to hear about either. It's not a two-way friendship, basically.

Update:

12:48PM
To: UB
From: Phx

I’m not a confrontational person. I didn’t know how to approach you about it, so I just quietly distanced myself because I was feeling like I couldn’t deal with it well.
No I didn’t bring a lunch, and I’m not feeling well—so I don’t know where/when/what I will eat.
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12:53PM
To: Phx
From: UB
It does not have to be confrontational; I promise I will not bite. I know that you have trouble with this but you can tell me and I will listen. I knew something was bothering you, are we ok?
I did not bring a lunch either, if you want to eat with me we could go to death by chocolate or something?
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1:03PM
To: UB
From: Phx

Ok. Well I was thinking of subway because they have soups—and hopefully their soups wont’ do to my what the cafe did.
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1:04PM
To: Phx
From: UB

I can do subway, you know me I am easy.
Going that is
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1:05PM
To: UB
From: Phx

Ok
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1:06PM
To: Phx
From: UB

Let me know when you are ready to go


I think I lost the battle--she won't change, she doesn't get it. It's not just the sarcasm.