is it so wrong that I want a small wedding of mostly people we do know, not a bunch of people we don't know that his parents invite because they feel obligated? is it so wrong that I'm putting my foot down and saying that I want a small wedding when Tom just wants to go with the flow with his mom and I am the one saying "no"? They are making me feel guilty for wanting an 80 person wedding---but I've just spent the past couple of weeks finding a nice non denominational chapel and finding reception halls that will fit that guest count... and they need to be booked because everything is filling up. we cant all of a sudden just up the guest list by half. is it unreasonable for me to not want all these peole i dont know at my wedding? tom's parents close friends, sure. a bunch of random people they feel obligated to invite, NO.
is this wrong?
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
Am I so wrong
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3 comments:
HELL NO, IT AIN'T WRONG.
BUT, stupid wedding etiquette needs to be taken into consideration. IF your mother in law is paying for a large portion of the wedding, she has the right to invite the people she wants.
If she isn't paying for the wedding you can officially tell her to piss up a rope.
And now that I have read Tom's blog, and see that your parents are kicking in to pay, your mother in law does have the right to invite some more people. That being said, perhaps you could compromise with her - Say you really love the chapel you found that only seats 80, and that you are willing to have a larger reception in a hall that can accommodate a higher guest list. . .
Hope this helps a bit. . .
not wrong, but i think it needs to be discussed in a calm manner with all those involved.
phoe is right. there might have to be some compromise, but make sure youre not the only one compromising.
My parents want to pay for most of it so that the wedding can remain in the hands of me and Tom. But both families are pitching in, so I think going with your idea of one party of a reception... a cheap hall we looked at is BIG. And if parents pay for their own guests' catering costs, and Tom and I pay for the hall and Tom's parents pay for the booze, it should be all good.
Thanks Phoe. :)
ghost: you are right--Tom and I are going to talk it all out tonight and then present his mom with the list (now that we have a copy of her list). I can see the light at the end of the tunnel again. wHew.
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