My body hit the floor

I have bruises on my arms from passing out on the toilet seat.

I blame it all on the licorice.

not on my own stupidity at drinking

warm vodka shooters

late on a work-night

and chasing them with a vodka cooler.

The evening started off innocently enough, with a softball double-header. It was a lame double-header: 2 five-inning games.

We won the first by a lot and lost the second by 2. Yuck. I got walked more times than I care to count, and hit a nice loopy ball over the shortstop's head. Yay me.

A guy on their team who umped a couple innings told me that the Chinese have sent up their first satellite or something into space and I'd never guess what's in it.

I guessed a stuffed:

or some

But he said what they sent was worse than those, and even worse than red licorice.

* * *

Tom had 6 beers at my game, I had none. So I tried catching up when we got home, only to very quickly find myself cooling my face with toilet flush-spray.

Ahhh...

Proceeded to puke, dry heave, and beg Tom to call an ambulance because I was going to DIE.

For 2 hours.

Tom dutifully turned off all the lights, turned off the music, didn't touch me and didn't talk.

My head felt like it was about to

But the rest of my body did instead. I could not move from the toilet. I knew I would die if my positioned changed from pathetic hunker-over-toilet. Tom had to go to the bathroom and circumstances prevented him from going in the toilet or in the tub....

So he drove drunk to a gas station and relieved himself.

Then he pulled the futon matress to just outside the bathroom door and told me that he was right there if I needed anything.

I woke up this morning staring at the likely never cleaned underside of our bathroom sink. Who would have thought tile could be so comfortable?

And I went to work. Still suffering from severe motion sickness type symptoms even now. I have to play in a 3 day softball beer tournament this weekend.

I heard about a book about a year ago... it claimed that alcohol is worse for a body than--I don't know. Pot, perhaps? I'll have to try to find out.

The thought of a warm vodka shooter now triggers my gag reflex.